48 Laws Of Power: Law #44 Disarm & Infuriate With The Mirror Effect

Law 44: Disarm and infuriate with the mirror effect

  •      When you mirror exactly what your enemies do, they cannot figure out your strategy
  •      The mirror effect mocks and humiliates them, making them overreact
  •      Hold a mirror to their psyches and you’ll seduce them and they’ll think they share your values
  •      Mirror their actions and they learn lessons

I always felt this law kind of overlapped a lot with the other laws. At least in the way I interpreted it. I figured the law means to mirror what others are currently saying/doing so that they feel that you are “one of the group.” Other laws that touch on this include:

  • Pose as a friend, work as a spy
  • Think as you like, but behave like others
  • Never outshine the master
  • Always say less than necessary

The other way I’ve heard this law interpreted is to “mirror” your opponent to mock them. Obviously this causes them to get angry and lose frame. A powerful way to discredit your opponent.

SUR

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48 Laws Of Power: Law #43 Work On The Hearts & Minds Of Others

Law 43: Work on the hearts and minds of others

  •      Coercion will work against you
  •      Seduce others into wanting to move in your direction
  •      Seduce others by operating on their individual psychologies and weaknesses
  •      Soften them by working their emotions and what they fear
  •      Ignore the hearts and minds and they will grow to hate you

Coercion creates a reaction that will eventually work against you. You must seduce others into wanting to move in your direction. A person you have seduced becomes your loyal pawn. And the way to seduce others is to operate on their individual psychologies and weaknesses. Soften up the resistant by working on their emotions, playing on what they hold dear and what they fear. Ignore the hearts and minds of others and they will grow to hate you.

A way to do this is just to listen. Sit with others and get them to open up with you. Don’t be a conversational narcissist. All humans struggle with this because when we hear someone mention they like Disney land or sports cars or yoga. We run it through our own filter, “what do I know about yoga.” Then we steer the conversation towards ourselves. Instead of doing this run the conversation through a filter of the other persons, emotions, motivations and character traits. Example:

Girl: “I love yoga”

Guy: “Awesome, you must be dedicated to learn all those different moves.”

Girl: “I went to Disney land with my niece last week and had a blast:

Guy: “I bet your niece really had fun with you and made you feel like a great aunt. That’s generous of you to take time out of your week to do that.”

SUR

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48 Laws Of Power: Law #42 Strike The Shepherd & The Sheep Will Scatter

Law 42: Strike the shepherd and the sheep will scatter

  •      Trouble can be traced to a single individual
  •      These people will influence others
  •      Do not negotiate but banish them
  •      Strike at the source of the trouble

Trouble can often be traced to a single strong individual – the stirrer, the arrogant underling, the poisoned of goodwill. If you allow such people room to operate, others will succumb to their influence. Do not wait for the troubles they cause to multiply, do not try to negotiate with them – they are irredeemable. Neutralize their influence by isolating or banishing them. Strike at the source of the trouble and the sheep will scatter.

What can we learn from this law?

  • Within any group, trouble can be traced to a single source, the unhappy, chronically unsatisfied one who stirs up dissension and infects the group. Recognize troublemakers by their complaining nature. Separate him from the group.

Remove toxic people from your life.

  • In every group power is concentrated in the hands of one or two people. Human nature shows people will orbit around a single strong personality.

Most of the people are sheeps, waiting for their shepherd to lead them down the path.

SUR

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48 Laws Of Power: Law #41 Avoid Stepping Into A Great Man’s Shoes

Law 41: Avoid stepping into a great man’s shoes

  •      What happens first always appears better and more original than what’s next
  •      Following great people means you must double their power
  •      Gain power by shining in your own way

Relationships

Don’t date a woman who was previously with a “Great man”

If she dated a successful man who treated her well and “fell in love” avoid her because you’ll never “be better than he was” at best you can hope to be is equal in her eyes. All he has to do it is show up and whatever you think you have with her is gone. Even if he doesn’t show up, you’ll never be “her true love” you’re just the poor replacement for a relationship she wish worked out .

If her father is some top dude, you’ll never meet the expectations she has for men because her father was SUPER successful. Avoid those spoiled princesses with the super alpha daddy. You’ll never fit into the gigantic shoes daddy left empty.

There are lots of examples of this law in play.

SUR

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48 Laws of Power: Law #36 Disdain Things You Cannot Have: Ignoring Them Is The Best Revenge

Law 36: Disdain things you cannot have: ignoring them is the best revenge

  •      Acknowledging petty problems gives them existence
  •      When you acknowledge an enemy you make them stronger
  •      The more you a mistake visible, the worse it gets
  •      If you want something but can’t have it, disdain it
  •      The less interest you reveal, the more superior you seem

“I think ignoring something you cannot have is fine. Just because somebody has something you want doesn’t mean you owe them anything like attention or validation. Showing active contempt signals juvenility and that yes you want that and no you can’t have it and therefor lowers your value.”

I’m pointing this out because the words “indifference” and “contempt” are used interchangeably here, but are actually worlds apart. If you want to seem powerful, show indifference. If you want to seem petty, show contempt.

Why? Because there’s a huge difference between showing contempt and showing indifference. In my experience, people who show contempt for something usually desire it a great deal. For an example from this sub, think about girls complaining about how much they “hate douchebags and assholes.” For an example from my personal life, I used to soak up greedily and articles that talked about how useless an Ivy League degree is, until I realized I was doing so because I really wish I could go back, work harder in high school and go to an Ivy League school. Most people are aware of this effect of contempt=secret desire, at least to the level at which they can recognize it in others, if not themselves.

On the other hand, showing indifference towards a thing does seem to convey power over that thing. It’s why the opposite of love isn’t hate, it’s indifference. It’s the difference between poor people decrying the hedonism of the rich (desire), and Warren Buffett living a simple life (indifference).

SUR

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48 Laws of Power: Law #35 Master The Art of Timing

Law 35: Master the art of timing

  •      Never seem in a hurry, always seem patient
  •      Sniff out the spirit of the times, find the trends that’ll give you power
  •      Learn to stand back when not ready, and then strike

First, BUY A WATCH. Yes, even in the 21st century when we all have phones in our pockets a watch is still a valuable tool. Having the exact time in your field of vision at almost all times is crucial when it comes to timing. It wasn’t until I started wearing a watch and keeping track of my time that I realized I was always in a hurry when I had no need to be. I always like to arrive early to places (if you are on time, you are late) and I always felt in a hurry, but I started to actually use time to my advantage.

Next, you have to let time work for you. Know that THE TIME WILL PASS ANYWAY. If you are choosing to waste your time looking at cats on youtube or whatever, just realize that time is going to pass no matter what. Take the time to think if that is how you want to be spending your time. Sure it is, you don’t have to do things til later right? Wrong. YOU CAN DO THEM NOW. Time now is the same as time later. A second is a second, an hour is an hour. Don’t waste them when you can use them.

Lastly, you will never be seen as hurried, if you are already done. If you get on top of problems IMMEDIATELY you will be in complete control of your time. Don’t be the person working on things, that process can take as long as you let it. You want to be the person already done. Do it early, do it right, do it once. This also makes it so you don’t have the weight of all these deadlines or works in progress to complete.

Timing is Crucial!!

SUR

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48 Laws of Power: Law #32 Play To People’s Fantasies

Law 32: Play to people’s fantasies

  •      The truth is unpleasant, avoid it
  •      People that manufacture romance are like oases in the desert
  •      There’s great power in tapping into people’s fantasies

I love this one. People will believe what they prefer to believe over anything else. Spin the illusion of grandeur and you will be treated accordingly. Men treat men the way they perceive others treat them. Watch any nobility or truly powerful man move through a crowded room. There’s a reason UN representatives are always trying to be the last one to enter a room.

SUR

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48 Laws of Power: Law #29 Plan All The Way To The End

Law 29: Plan all the way to the end

  •      The ending is everything
  •      Take into account the scenario
  •      If you plan, you won’t be overwhelmed
  •      Guide fortune by thinking far ahead

Good derivative of this law is to establish a 1,5, 10, 20 year plan. Every new years eve, I gather with my inner circle and we discuss this plan in detail (This is before the new years festivities, we are all sober at this point). We talk about what ideas have worked/failed towards attaining our specific goals and discuss what changes we are going to make. Its great motivational tool throughout the year because we hold each other accountable.

SUR

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