The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate
By: Gary Chapman
Do you remember the old saying, “Actions speak louder than words”? For some people, that is particularly true of love. If acts of service is your spouse’s primary love language, nothing will speak more deeply to him or her emotionally than simple acts of service.
For people who have “acts of service” as their primary love language, helpful acts are seen as very powerful expressions of love and devotion. Actions like cooking a meal, setting a table, washing dishes, vacuuming, taking out the garbage, mowing the grass, etc. are all acts of service. If done with a positive spirit and without expecting something in return, they are indeed expressions of love.
Within every language, there are many dialects. If you have a significant other with acts of service as his/her primary love language, find out the specific things he/she would like by asking. If you are the person with that specific love language, let your spouse know which actions mean the most to you.
Here are a few ideas of acts of kindness you can make a part of the every day routine for your partner:
- During the cold months, put a towel in the dryer while your spouse is showering so it’s all fluffy and warm when he/she gets out.
- Clean the kitchen or bathroom
- Men: Be a gentleman and walk on the “dangerous” side of the road so she feels protected.
- Fix things that the other can’t fix.
- Buy or make him/her lunch and bring it to him/her at work, even if (especially if) it’s out of your way.
- Cook a special meal that you know he/she likes.
- Fill up your gas tank without being asked.
- Drop your spouse at the door when it is raining.
- Men: Open car doors for your wife.
- Go to the grocery store and buy items you know he/she loves—without being asked.
Let Your Help Come from the Heart
Make sure you are helping and giving because you want to; however, don’t overextend yourself and feel resentful for doing the lion’s share of the giving. Acts of Service lovers don’t want people helping them out of obligation. They love a cheerful helper! A happy smile and a helping hand translates to, “You are the best and I love you!” And if your honey does speak the language of Service, he or she will probably be serving you a lot as well. After all, it comes naturally for them!
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