Law 43: Work on the hearts and minds of others
- Coercion will work against you
- Seduce others into wanting to move in your direction
- Seduce others by operating on their individual psychologies and weaknesses
- Soften them by working their emotions and what they fear
- Ignore the hearts and minds and they will grow to hate you
Coercion creates a reaction that will eventually work against you. You must seduce others into wanting to move in your direction. A person you have seduced becomes your loyal pawn. And the way to seduce others is to operate on their individual psychologies and weaknesses. Soften up the resistant by working on their emotions, playing on what they hold dear and what they fear. Ignore the hearts and minds of others and they will grow to hate you.
A way to do this is just to listen. Sit with others and get them to open up with you. Don’t be a conversational narcissist. All humans struggle with this because when we hear someone mention they like Disney land or sports cars or yoga. We run it through our own filter, “what do I know about yoga.” Then we steer the conversation towards ourselves. Instead of doing this run the conversation through a filter of the other persons, emotions, motivations and character traits. Example:
Girl: “I love yoga”
Guy: “Awesome, you must be dedicated to learn all those different moves.”
Girl: “I went to Disney land with my niece last week and had a blast:
Guy: “I bet your niece really had fun with you and made you feel like a great aunt. That’s generous of you to take time out of your week to do that.”
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